It was 5:00 on a rainy Thursday, and everything was just normal.
I spent that day running errands by myself, crossing items off my list, running, reading, resting a little. My mom was loving on my kids, giving me the day off from my life as a homeschooling Mom.
My husband trained his sales staff on a new tablet system around our kitchen table that day, leaving unexpected afternoon time for us to talk. I was just about to get in the car and pick up our little people from Mom’s house.
30 seconds later, nothing was the same.
None of my plans mattered anymore. That beach trip we needed to call and set up, the blog posts I wanted to finish, lesson plans waiting on my desk, the shelves my hubbie was about to build in the garage for me to organize…all of it seemed pointless.
My husband took the phone call I’ve always feared. I could hear it in his voice, something urgent. About my Dad.
On our way to Mom’s, he called a friend, who came over immediately to stay with our kids.
It took forever to get to the hospital. Combine rain with rush hour, and Raleigh falls apart. The ambulance took Dad to the furthest hospital across town, Big Wake. We kept asking Why? Why did they take him to Big Wake?
We knew he was installing blinds on a high ladder when he fell. And that he didn’t know his last name. We talked to the customer who found him, to our office staff and installers, to God, to the hospital, but we could only grasp for clues during the 40-minute ride.
We found him in the emergency room, in and out of consciousness. His main concern was getting out of the neck brace. At one point, he told a nurse, My neck’s not broken. I would KNOW if my neck was broken! He made us laugh, even while we all stood around his emergency room with him lying there, in and out of sleep.
The next morning, they moved him to a room in the Neuro ICU for a few days. Things were up and down. We talked with doctors and googled every idea they tossed around. Some doctors thought a stroke caused the fall. But in the end, the brain bleed was in a location consistent with a fall and not a stroke.
My older sister flew in from Tennessee. It was touch and go for a little while, but Dad started looking better. Waking up a little here and there. Remembering more. They let us take him home.
But then the fevers began. High fevers, shaking, confusion. We went back to the emergency room. His fever came down, and they sent us home. After another night of high fevers, Mom and her friend (a nurse) took Dad back to the emergency room, determined to get to the bottom of this.
They were leaning toward meningitis, which made stroke feel like a win.
But a friend mentioned Lyme Disease, and Mom remembered Dad pulling a tick off his leg the week before his fall. Suddenly his labs were consistent with Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever, and they started him on antibiotics.
He looks like a million bucks now. Other than the purple eye, some extra gray hairs, and a lot of bumps and bruises. Oh, and he cannot complete a proper push-up yet. But who knows why we know that?
I wish I processed “ordeals” like this more quickly, but instead my feelings come in fits and spurts. In the middle of traffic, in the middle of the store, in the middle of vacuuming or reading my littlest a story.
I thank God He’s not done with my Dad {here} yet. But it’s the lingering question that stops me.
What if?
What then?
Before I knew Dad would be okay, I had to answer. Even if—I will trust God. Even when His plan comes opposite my wishes.
Because even in our heartache, God is good. Because He is coming again to set us free from pain and death. Because NOTHING can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus, not even the most painful losses.
After the last couple weeks, I’m more certain of this than ever.
Wow. What an ordeal. I’m so sorry you had to go through that. It sounds so awful and nerve-wracking. I’m glad to hear that he’s better. When you say, “I will trust God. Even when His plan comes opposite my wishes” it really made me think about some occurrences lately in my life. Thank you for that. Excellent post… Glad I stopped by from FMF.
Thanks for visiting from FMF! So glad you could apply it, and thanks for the encouragement!
Beautiful story Ang! So happy things are going better for all of you.
Thanks so much Sue! We are thrilled those days are behind us. 🙂
Beautiful. I know that sinking feeling when everything is peaceful and in an instant you find out someone you love is hurt. I’m so glad your dad is better and they figured out what was wrong. I pray he continues to heal. ~ Melissa Weaver from Inklings
Thanks so much Melissa!
Angela, thank you for sharing what you have been facing these past few weeks. Life is so fragile and God is our strength and His is good! I enter his courts with praise for the way he has brought your Dad through this ordeal.
I know how difficult it is to process these hard knocks in life. But is helps us to see the way God brings us through.
Yes, Rebekah…I know you know! Thanks for stopping by…
I love this. So much. Beautifully written, powerful words. They touched me. Dealing with the loss of my beloved mother-in-law and grandmother. Your words are encouraging and they are truth. Nothing separates my from God’s love – not even my pain. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you. I am so sorry for the losses you are dealing with. Thanks for your comment.
Yes.. eyes filled with tears, but yes!
It has been a heavy weight to carry. Our pain is real and hard even though we know the Lord is with us. These are powerful, heart-filled words, Ang. Thank you. What a peace in the storm we have knowing He will never leave us or forsake us, as His Word says. God is so good….
So glad your father is doing better. Your what if question is one that can linger in my thoughts at times. Since becoming a question I’ve had no experiences to rock me to the core. I feel my faith and trust in God is strong but what if….? What if something happened to my husband while deployed? What if something happened to my son when he deploys? What if….? I’m left with knowing I need to keep seeking to know Him more and more. Thank you for sharing. Blessings.
So glad Dave is doing well. Praying for him and the whole fam.
Glad to know that your dad is so much better. Pastor Smith and I was lifting his name up before The Lord and He heard our prayers. God is sooo good as the song goes. All praise and honor goes to Him. Beautiful reading Angie 🙂
We appreciate your prayers so much! Thanks for your words, and yes…All praise to the Lord!
Love this! So glad he’s doing better!
Thanks Carley!
Very scary…but I love a happy ending. I got a call recently from the Nursing Home where my mother, who has Alzheimer’s, lives. They were on the way to the hospital and her DNR papers were with her. I rushed to the hospital knowing this could be it. After a pacemaker, mom has recovered well. But this too made me think What If? My dad has passed on…and while I miss him terribly every day, I know he is at peace in Heaven!
Oh Elise, Thanks for sharing that piece of your story. I’m so glad your Mom was okay, though I’m sure dealing with Alzheimer’s is extremely difficult. I appreciate your words here!